If December is a blur of wrapping paper and sugar cookies, May is its overstimulated, under caffeinated twin—less sparkle, more stress.
Meet Maycember: the term exhausted moms are circulating online to name the very real chaos that descends as the school year ends. Teacher Appreciation Week. End-of-year recitals. Summer camp registrations (and waitlists). Graduation ceremonies. Field days. All of it crashing down right around Mother’s Day—when moms are somehow expected to slow down and celebrate.
Let’s be clear: Maycember is a cultural moment that exposes a deeper truth. Moms don’t just need a brunch. They need structural support.
Behind the scenes of every beautifully wrapped teacher gift or perfectly timed field day snack is a mental checklist only one person is keeping: mom. While others see a packed calendar, she sees a minefield of missed RSVPs, costume deadlines, and camp waitlists. It’s the kind of emotional labor that mirrors the holiday season—but without the societal recognition, the festive buildup, or even the backup.
Sociologist Allison Daminger defines this as cognitive labor—the anticipatory work of remembering and planning—and confirms that mothers do the lion’s share of it. Her 2019 study in the American Sociological Review found that even when couples reported splitting household chores, women still shouldered most of the mental workload behind the scenes.
The result? Moms in May aren’t just overwhelmed—they’re invisibly managing the lives of their families while also working, parenting, and processing milestones like “the last preschool pickup ever” or “our first middle schooler.”
Related: Moms don’t need a baby bonus—they need paid leave, childcare, and real support
Burnout is the baseline
It’s not just anecdotal. According to a 2024 Gallup report, working women in the U.S. report higher levels of stress, burnout, and work-life conflict than any other demographic group. Women who manage competing work and family demands daily are 81% more likely to feel burned out compared to their peers. And for moms, those pressures often hit hardest during high-stakes months like May.
What’s clear is this: the problem isn’t poor planning or personal failure—it’s a system that offloads the pressure onto moms without providing the support they need to carry it. There are no institutional buffers. No built-in pause buttons. Just more demands, squeezed into less time, under higher emotional stakes.
In short: if you feel like you’re barely holding it together right now, you’re not failing. You’re functioning in a system designed without you in mind.
The Mother’s Day paradox
Here comes the twist: In the middle of all this, it’s Mother’s Day.
A holiday created to honor care often ends up spotlighting just how little our society actually supports it. For one day, society gushes over moms with cards and flowers. The rest of the year? Moms are left to hold it all together without the policies or infrastructure that actually make caregiving sustainable.
The U.S. remains the only industrialized country without guaranteed paid maternity leave, according to the OECD. And the cost of childcare in many states now rivals college tuition.
This context matters: moms aren’t burning out because they’re doing it wrong. They’re burning out because the system relies on their unpaid labor—and celebrates them just enough to keep that system going.
So what do moms need?
Here’s the thing: Moms don’t need a mimosa. They need time, equity, and policy.
1. Redistributed Labor
In a 2023 Pew Research Center study, 78% of mothers say they manage their children’s schedules and activities, compared to just 33% of fathers. That imbalance becomes even more glaring in high-load months like May. Want to celebrate Mother’s Day? Start by fully sharing the Maycember load.
2. Support Beyond the Family Unit
Care work fuels our society—but it’s still undervalued and underpaid. From paid leave to subsidized child care to caregiver tax credits, these supports aren’t “nice to haves.” They’re critical infrastructure for families and the economy.
Let’s reimagine May
If Maycember is a mirror, what does it reveal?
It shows us a society that still asks moms to perform miracles on a daily basis—then blames them when they drop the ball. It reveals a care economy that exists entirely off the backs of women who are expected to sacrifice without acknowledgment.
So this May, let’s ask the men in our lives, our communities, and our allies to rewrite the script.
- Let’s expect dad to plan the teacher gifts without assuming it’s the mom’s job.
- Let’s give moms a break from the performance of perfection.
- Let’s support legislation that values care work as the foundation of the economy—not as an afterthought.
The bottom line
Maycember isn’t just a funny name for a stressful season. It’s a cry for help from millions of mothers who are maxed out, burned out, and tapped out.
And until we stop expecting a candle and a card to fix what is clearly a structural crisis, the burnout will keep coming back—every May, and every day in between.
This Mother’s Day, don’t just say thank you.
Share the load. Change the systems. And let moms rest.
Related: How Kate Ryder is reinventing women’s healthcare—starting with moms
Sources:
- Extra workload. American Sociological Association. 2019. “The Cognitive Dimension of Household Labor.”
- Frequent burnout. Gallup. 2024. “More Than a Program: A Culture of Women’s Wellbeing at Work.”
- No guaranteed paid maternity leave. OECD. “Parental leave systems.”
- Cost of childcare rivals college tuition. Economic Policy Institute. 2025. “Child care costs in the United States.”
- Mothers taking extra work load. Pew Research Center. 2023. “Gender and parenting.”